Reconnecting Your Coven

In the ebb and flow of life, sometimes we lose that special connection with our coven. People become distant and disconnected as the twists and turns of life takes us in all kinds of directions. Even though we have technology that enables us to instantly connect, many people have felt the effects of being isolated and confined to their homes in the past year. Many of us yearn for in-person interactions and the return of “regular” life after the pandemic.

On-going global issues have put a strain on covens, but strains on covens are not new. Practitioners have dealt with the rise and fall of energy in covens long before the isolation of the pandemic. How can you reconnect with your coven? How can you re-energize your coven to help boost the collective magickal practice? Here are some great ways to reinvigorate not only your personal connection to your coven but the group as a whole unit.

Take a Class Together

Moving to online interactions over the last year doesn’t have to leave your coven disjointed. In fact, it may be easier for everyone to get together! Rebuild your bonds as a group by learning some new magickal skills together. There are lots of online Tarot classes and crystal workshops you can all attend together. The best part is that you can do it from the comfort of your own home. And you can even take a class from a practitioner in another state since it is digital. Use this class as a springboard for discussions and rituals. By engaging in a single class, each coven member will have their own perspective and knowledge to share.

Create a Weekly Discussion Theme

What better way to reconnect than by having a weekly discussion? Choose a topic for each week and practice your active listening skills with your coven mates. The topic could be based on your magickal practice, such as your preferred method of divination or how you told your parents you were a practitioner. But it could also be something focused on ethics, local politics, or just simply ‘getting to know you’ questions. These discussions allow people to reconnect by learning about one another, thus strengthening the bonds.

Have a Collective Project or Goal

Working on a collective project helps bring people together in magickal ways. Choose an activity such as healing, activism, or some form of community engagement that the entire coven can participate in. Maybe you are a feminist coven that wants to raise funds for a women’s shelter, or you want to help get socks and blankets for incarcerated individuals. Whatever the task, take it on together as a group. Setting a goal is a great way to work together, feel good about your efforts, and bring some community recognition to your coven.

But your project doesn’t have to be related to helping the community. It could be a collective coven goal of having a public ritual for each Sabbat or connecting with another local coven to put on a ritual together.

Connecting with people in your coven can be time-consuming, especially if you have a higher than normal turn-over. Building friendships and relationships built on mutual trust takes time and a lot of effort. If you are feeling personally disconnected, here are a few ways to reconnect with your coven mates.

Be a Friend

Just be a friend. Randomly text to say good morning. Ask them to join you for a drink after dinner. Bring them something you made because it makes you feel good. Invite them over to watch a movie. No one ever gets upset when someone else acts like a true friend! Plus, the more you act like a good friend, the more your coven mate will feel safe to return the feelings. Remember, what you put out is often what you get back. So put out some friendship and watch how it comes back threefold!

Reach Out

It’s hard to take the first step. But it is important to reach out to people in your coven one on one. Your coven mates should be like family, the best parts of family. But you have to make time to engage and participate in their lives too. Pick up the phone and make a call, or just send an email to say you are thinking of them. Pay attention when they tell you about their life so you can ask follow-up questions and reach out later for an update on how things went. Offer to go with them to an appointment or bring over sandwiches during their lunch break. If you don’t reach out, the relationship cannot grow and develop the roots it needs.

It may not be you that is disconnected. You may notice that other coven mates aren’t showing up or disconnecting from the group. In this situation, it is important to reach out and make sure they are doing alright. Don’t pressure them to return; just let them know they still have their coven as a support net. Placing additional pressure on them to reconnect might be even more overwhelming. Learn more about their situation and see how you can lend a helping hand.

When reconnecting with your coven, it is important to manage your expectations. You cannot instantly feel connected after a period of distance. It takes time to redevelop a friendship or create a new one. Plus, your coven mates may be going through various life-changing events that have pulled them away from the group, such as medical issues, having kids, getting married or divorced, or work demands. These all impact not only our available time but our perception of the world.

Being part of a coven is wonderful! With the right people, it can literally be a magickal experience as you grow together in your practice and your personal life. Coven mates are great resources for new information as well as inspiration. But sometimes, people flake, bail, get sick, or have emergencies that take them away from the group. In this case, it is important to reconnect periodically with one another and revive the energy of the coven.